Big Fish Little Fish

Posted by Ali-G (Ottawa, Canada) on 31 October 2006 in Animal & Insect.

So there I was about 500 million years ago - give or take a billion or so - swimming around the primordial sea thinking - hey real estate, land, now that's where it's at. Instead of being a small fish in a big pond, why don't I cut out the middle man and become King of the Hill. Evolve dammit - become a land rover! I'd be famous - revered as the bright spark that led the charge to land by all who followed! But wouldn't ya know, those damn jealous whales wanted to be first and so they bit my legs off - what the hell good is it becoming a land animal if you can't wander on down to the local watering hole for a big mud slurpee? So waa waa waa - guess who gets credited for leading the charge to land? Big-butt belugas. And I end up working for the government. But whale sashimi is tasty!

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